So dumb!

Ok, whenever there is a crime in which a UIC student, etc. is involved, the campus police email an "Urgent Crime Alert" to all UIC students, faculty, and staff. Usually the crimes are crimes of opportunity, i.e. the victim did something dumb that opened them up to becoming a victim. One of my favorites up to this point is the undergrad walking home at 2 am who decided it would be alright to take a shortcut down an alley. At least, that was my favorite until today's crime alert. Below you will find the text of the email, in it's original form except for the emphasis formatting I added at the especially awesome parts.

Sunday evening at 6:10, a UIC student was the victim of an off-campus strong-arm
robbery at the Marathon gas station at Ashland Avenue and Roosevelt Road. The
student was putting air in a car tire when two offenders approached and asked
for change to get on the bus. The student pulled out a wallet and gave
them change. The offenders grabbed the wallet, pulling the student to
the ground, and fled east on Roosevelt with the wallet. The student had
minor abrasions to the knees but refused medical attention.

The offenders are described as follows:

1) Male/black, 5-9, 150 pounds, wearing black sweater and black jeans
2) Male/black, 5-6, 150 pounds, wearing black jacket and black jeans

UIC Police recommend *not* giving coins or cash to people who ask for money,
both for your own safety as well as to avoid contributing to possible substance
abuse. Consider donating to a shelter or charity instead. If you choose to give
an individual money, exercise caution.

UIC Police *do* recommend complying with a demand for money or possessions if a
weapon is displayed or a threat of violence is made.

Note that while it is not illegal for someone to ask you for money, aggressive
panhandling, even without a physical threat, is against the law. Notify police.

Awesome! Seriously, you are going to pull out your wallet?! And then not let go of it when they grab it, causing you to fall down and hurt yourself? Not to mention this pair seems to be hitting this neighborhood lately, working as a team and getting a lot of money, cell phones, and Ipods. They never really hurt anyone, although they often claim to have a weapon. The kicker is this pair has been described in MULTIPLE crime alerts over the course of the semester and this kid STILL pulls out his wallet. I understand wanting to be a decent human being and help out your fellow man, but my generosity in the city only goes so far.

For those of you who are wondering, the place where the robbery took place is just about a mile from my apartment. UIC has multiple campuses. I live near and work on the East campus, the medical campus is about 1/2 mile to our West, and South campus is just across a road from East campus. This pair of bandits work the West side, preying on sleep deprived medical students who are not as vigilant.

That's all. Just found it hilarious. Time to study.

Love!

~g

p.s. yes, I carry self-protection devices with me, including incredibly potent mace laced with a dye that is illegal for civilians to carry in most states (but not this one!) and a "screamer" that at the push of a button starts wailing at 125 decibels (a jet taking off is 118). Really, though, if something were to happen I would just hand over the goods and not risk the possibility of a weapon being used on me.

I thought we were the golden standard of civilization and decency.