Acceptance

"I am more secure in who I am, in what I believe, and more content with myself than I can ever remember being."

In a recent exchange of messages with a friend I wrote the above words. I have thought of them ever since. For the first time in my adult life I am at peace with myself. I am comfortable expressing my thoughts and feelings openly and honestly. I am spending my time as I wish, be it alone or out with friends or running errands or attending church. I no long fear the reactions of others in regards to how I act, what I do, and how I think. I am just being me, fully, and I am happier than I have been in a very long time.

The timing of this new-found contentment is a bit odd, given what has been happening in my world, but at the same time is understandable for the same reason. All of the areas of my life over which I am personally involved (but not completely responsible for) seem to be in turmoil. Work is still filled with drama, my job search remains unproductive, and I continue to be the reigning queen of Singledom. Chaos is swirling all around me, but, rather than trying to exert my control-freak tendencies, I am fully calm. It's a new experience for me.

I have finally figured out that I can't control the world; I can only control myself. I am currently figuring out that by controlling myself, I am creating a ripple effect of peace and acceptance that is working on all of the upheaval surrounding me. The biggest lesson so far, though, has been the realization that the only control I truly have is the ability to recognize I don't really control anything, including myself.

I know, I know, I am talking in riddles and circles. But it makes sense to me. And really, this will make sense to most of you as well when I put it this way: "Thy will be done". The more I come to believe in the truth of those four words, the more I say and practice them, the more peaceful I become. However, I'm not just experiencing peace. I'm also experiencing what it is to actually accept and love myself as I am. I'm finally seeing in me what others have seen and loved all along.

I was recently complimented for my integrity. Not that long ago I never would have thought I possessed true integrity. Or rather, I never would have thought I had a particular set of morals or values that required integrity. Now I know I do.

I was recently complimented for my generosity. Not that long ago I never would have thought I was abundantly generous. Or rather, I never would have thought my generous acts were anything out of the ordinary. Now I know they are.

I was recently complimented for my kind heart. Not that long ago I never would have thought my heart was overly kind. Or rather, I never would have thought my choice to believe people are inherently good sets me apart from the cynicism and skepticism that surrounds us. Now I know it does.

Life is pretty awesome right now.

Love!

~g

Perception

I don't know why, but lately most everything, even the ordinary things, strike me as blessings. Perhaps I am developing a greater understanding of the world. Perhaps I am developing a greater understanding of myself. Perhaps it's both. Perhaps it's neither.

When I park further away from the door in the parking lot for extra exercise I'm thinking about how lucky I am that I have the ability to walk. When I listen to the spring birdsong I am grateful my ears work properly. When I'm squinting against the sun I am reminded how fortunate I am to see. When I wake in the middle of the night because I am too warm with all of my blankets I remember millions are sleeping unprotected outdoors, having no home or pillow to call their own.

My life is good. My life, simple as it is, consists of the things many dream and hope and pray for. I have a loving family. I have a home. I have a job that pays the bills and leaves a little left over. I am relatively healthy. I have good friends. I have experienced sorrow but never tragedy. I have nearly limitless choices regarding who I want to be and what I want my life to mean. I can speak as I want to speak and believe as I want to believe without fear of retribution or persecution. I have the freedom to travel where I like when I like. I can love whomever I want to love.

I am not so naive as to believe my life will always be this good. Trials will come. Suffering will occur. Difficult situations and decisions will present themselves. Hearts will break and tears will be shed. Pain, doubt, and anger will crowd out peace, trust, and joy. Faith will falter.

I pray that when life becomes hard I will remember to see the blessings. I hope I never become so selfish and self-involved that I stop looking outside myself. And may I always remember that true grace requires active practice.

Love!

~g

Small town living

I grew up in a small town. I've lived in mid-sized cities and extremely large metropolises and have done well, but I am a small town person at heart. And I am country at heart. I need trees. I need quiet (relative, of course). I need to be able to see the stars. You know that Dixie Chicks song that says, "I wanna look at the horizon and not see a building standing tall"? That's me. I like space and openness.

Feeling as I do is not just because I was raised in a town with less than 2000 people. It's also from a childhood and summers spent treating the mountains of Colorado like my own personal play ground. It's from countless road trips with my parents and grandparents and the chance to experience all sorts of different people and lifestyles. And it's from spending several years living in the heart of Chicago.

Don't get me wrong, I want to travel extensively and see the world. I want to visit all of the large cities and small villages and everything in between. I want to experience everything life and this world have to offer, living my life actively rather than passively. But at the end of all of that I want to come home to a small town.

I took a walk through my town today. The size of my waistline, combined with the cost of gas, and a need to just be out led me to walk downtown to complete the errands I needed to do. Along the way I was passed by both the girls and boys high school track teams. They were out running the streets as part of their practice. The girls team was incredibly noisy, with all of the girls running in a large bunch and talking and laughing together. The boys team was much quieter and more spread out, with the true jocks about two blocks ahead of the adorably chubby kid who would alternate running a few steps and speed walking. I was reminded immediately of my high school days, of the fun and innocence and great expectations I had and it made me smile.

At the drug store the clerk and I chatted about the weather and the promise of spring and the great quote she had chosen for the chalk board in the wine section (something along the lines of "wine is the only gift that makes both the giver and the receiver look good"... hilarious and a little true). When she said she enjoyed chatting with me and thanked me for coming in I believed she actually meant it.

After the drug store I went next door to the post office. A man was inside and just about to open the door to leave when he saw me. He pulled open the door, held it for me, and responded to my thanks by looking me in the eyes and saying, "You're very welcome, ma'am" before smiling at me. A real gentleman, although I could have done without the ma'am. :)

I took a different route home and came across a lady out walking her dog. To make the passing easier I diverted to the street. Potentially misinterpreting my action, the owner informed me as we passed that her dog was friendly. I had met this particular dog once before, about 10 years ago, yet still remembered the dog's name is Snickers. So Snickers, her owner, and I stopped in the street to chat while Snickers and I became reacquainted.

I was enjoying my walk so when it came time to turn right and head home, I instead turned left and wound up at the public library. I used to live in the library, particularly in my elementary and middle school days. Back then the library was in the old fire station. It was cramped and packed to the gills and a wonderful place to just get lost for hours. The new library is much more modern and open, but in the end still full of books and still just as easy to get lost in. I ended up carrying home five books, checking them out under the account that was set up for me in 1993.

The route home took me past the nursing home. During 5th grade I volunteered quite a bit at that nursing home, spending my afternoons reading large-print editions of Reader's Digest aloud, playing board and card games, and trying to keep up with Flo. Flo was one of the nursing home's feistier residents. She would tell the most outlandish stories and could come up with the best pranks. The thing I remember most about her, though, is her glass eye. One of her favorite things to do was to pop out that eye and either attempt to frighten the kid volunteers (it only worked once on me) or hide the eye and make the nurses look for it (they didn't care so much for that). Good memories.

In the space of an hour today I interacted on a truly personal level with a handful of people and had a chance to reminisce about some very good times in my life. All because I live in a small town. Of course, you can interact on a truly personal level with people in a large city, too, but it's harder. You actually have to try in a large city. Here, it's just a natural way of life. I like that.

Wow, this turned into a rather long post about nothing in particular. :) I guess I just felt like writing today!

Love!

~g

Selections from my current playlist

What I've been up to

I've been pretty busy since Christmas. Honestly, I'm having trouble believing it's almost March. Time has just been flying by! To recap everything I've been doing would take way too long and result in a post that would be both a) a novel and b) not very interesting to most of you. So, the less detailed version is as follows...

Tomorrow I take my car in for an oil change that's 500 miles overdue. My last oil change was at the beginning of January. Now, I know certain members of my family regularly drive 3500 miles in less than two months, but my average time between oil changes is usually a bit longer. However, my travel schedule since the start of the new year looked like this:

Jan 7-10: Grace to Indiana

Jan 14-17: Bryan and Nolan in Iowa

Jan 29-31: Grace to Indiana

Feb 6-7: Grace and Bryan and Nolan met up in Illinois

Feb 25-27: Bryan in Iowa

So, obviously, Bryan and I have continued to see each other since Christmas. Given coordinating schedules and travel isn't exactly the easiest thing when the parties involved include a woman who has a different schedule from week to week and a man who works three jobs and cares for a 4-year-old, I'd say we've done pretty well in the past two months. Actually, in looking at how often we managed to see each other, I think we've done a fantastic job of juggling schedules and life in general. Throw in the fact that we've done all this travel at the worst time of year for driving and we start to seem super heroish. Go us.

For those that are curious, it's about a 7.5-8 hour drive from my place to Bryan's (approximately 450 miles one-way), depending on weather and stops, but it's interstate most of the way and honestly does not seem like such a long drive. Except for the road that takes you across Indiana. That's 110 miles of sheer torture. Seriously.

While I could write a lot about each trip, I won't bore you with the details of every visit. Suffice to say we've been having fun. I learned during the first January trip to Indiana that one should not attend a sporting event with someone who works at the sporting arena in which the event is held. Those camera guys scattered around the venue tend to focus on people they know when things like the Kiss Cam come up on the Jumbotron. Oi. Another visit involved more time spent at the fire station, similar to Christmas, and making supper for Bryan's crew. I went with the tried-and-true, male-tested-and-approved, meat-and-potato dinner. With cheesecake for dessert. If I was being put to the test at all I am sure I passed. Although I can't take all of the credit, since Bryan helped me cook.

This coming weekend we were supposed to be seeing Bryan's brother's band play at a place in Cedar Falls, but their show was cancelled. Instead, it looks like we'll be spending that evening with some of my friends. We're thinking about dinner and bowling. I'm so old-fashioned.

Two things have become apparent with all of these trips. The first is that whenever we have plans to see each other it is going to snow and one or both of us is going to end up driving in some pretty hazardous conditions. The second is that some type of emergency is likely to happen. I think the universe knows when Bryan is around to help. He thinks I'm bad luck.

My first trip to Indiana we were on our way home from a museum when we came upon a 3-car accident that had just happened. Although he was technically off-duty, Bryan is a first responder and it's in his nature and training to check out things like that. His SUV is equipped with the emergency lights and radios, so he turned on the lights and called in the accident before getting out to see if everyone was alright. Bryan's son and I stayed in the truck. We stuck around until the police, fire engine, and ambulance arrived then continued on with our plans.

Bryan's first trip to Iowa involved an elderly woman passing out in church two pews behind us. The pastor was in the middle of his sermon when he realized the lady was having trouble, so he stopped to inquire if there were any doctors or nurses present. Bryan, who I swear was half asleep, was up and out of the pew before I even had time to fully turned around. He got the lady lying down, elevated her feet, and she eventually woke up. Church was cut short that day, letting out once the fire engine and ambulance arrived (are you seeing a theme here?). Once again, I sat and watched. Geez, I'm making myself sound pretty useless. The lady was fine, by the way. Her blood pressure had just dropped really low. I guess people passing out in church is a common thing, at least according to Bryan. It was a first for me.

On to other topics. I am happy to report that once again we have a full staff at work. The management position we've had open since November was filled a little over two weeks ago. This means less stress for our team, less strain on the Cedar Falls team since we were using two of their managers to help in our store on a regular basis, and more time off! Although we had only been officially short-staffed since November, the other manager and I have really been running the store since last February. It's been a year of drama and stress and we're both happy it seems to be ending. We're gearing up for our huge semi-annual sale in the middle of March, but really we're not too worried about that. Dani and I are both veterans of this particular event.

I continue to search and apply for jobs, but for the time being I'm not getting responses. It seems C & B is where I am supposed to be for the moment. I am learning an awful lot about patience.

I had to utilize my new health insurance just days after it went into effect. I came down with a sinus infection and bronchitis at the beginning of February. Rest, antibiotics, and lots of fluids seem to have done the trick and I am once again healthy, although already not looking forward to next February. This is two years in a row I've gotten sick with a respiratory thing in February. At least I'm predictable.

I do believe those are the highlights. Save for all of the travel, my life is really pretty uneventful and boring.

I hope this finds everyone healthy and happy!

Love!

~g

Adulthood

The purpose of this post is simply an announcement:

For the first time in my life I have health insurance that is not the result of my parents' jobs but rather the product of my own work and sacrifice. After 13 months of being uninsured, my health/dental/vision plans took effect at midnight on February 1.

Holy crap, I'm an adult.

I've been doing a lot of travelling these past few weeks. More to come on those trips/visits soon.

Love!

~g

What is love?

What is conservative? What is liberal? What is the difference in holding others to a higher standard and pushing your beliefs on others? At what point does having morals and values interfere with having an open mind and accepting differences? How does one discern between compromising and settling? What is the real meaning of love?

I have had a lot on my mind lately.

The last question is really the most important since it gave rise to the others. After a lot of thought I've come to a conclusion that I was already mostly aware of: I can be a difficult person to love.

That's not to say I'm a bad person or that I am any less deserving of love as the next person, only that sometimes I'm not the easiest person to love and that can be hard on those who do love me. I don't think I am at all extraordinary in this regard; perhaps the extraordinary thing is that I am aware of many of the things that make it hard to always love me. Woohoo for self reflection and being honest with oneself! There's nothing like being forced to really examine the person you've become. It can feel like a root canal performed without Novocaine. For the last few weeks, in particular, I have spent a significant amount of time in the metaphorical dentist's chair and the pain killers have been in short supply.

In just the last week alone I have experienced a wide range of emotions. I have laughed. I have cried. I have been nauseated. I have been lonely. I have been angry. I have have been incredibly sad. I have been nervous. I have been impatient. I have felt at peace. And I have been utterly exhausted.

Why am I such a difficult person to love? It's simply because I demand as much from those who love me as what I give in return. Fair? Some may say no, but I think it is. I have been accused of being too idealistic and for living in a fantasy land. I have been accused of asking too much of others. I guess "accused" is not really the correct term since I really am pretty idealistic and I really do ask a lot of others.

I want a lot out of life. I know reality will interfere, that plans will change, and that there are infinite amounts of shades of grey. Still, that doesn't mean I can't strive for what I want and hopefully get something close to the ideal. The thing I want the most from life is to love and be loved.

I have a very specific idea of what true love looks like. Perhaps it's because I grew up watching Disney movies or perhaps it's because I've read too many romance novels, but I prefer to think it's because I have seen wonderful examples of real love from members of my family and from my friends.

To me love is the most wonderful gift you can give someone and receive in return. It is powerful and consuming. It forsakes all others. It is committed, passionate, faithful, loyal, patient, accepting, considerate, joyous, peaceful, hopeful, exciting, and content. It's seeing the flaws in another person and choosing to not focus on them. It's putting the needs of someone else over your own. It's honoring and respecting another individual's thoughts, emotions, and desires. It's being supportive even when the support is not easy to give. In short, true love is incredibly selfless and requires a great deal of sacrifice. When all written out, it doesn't sound too pleasant. It sounds like loving someone takes a lot from a person. In all honesty, that's true. But if the person you love gives you back the same kind of love, then you lose nothing and gain everything.

That's the kind of love I give, so that's the type of love I demand. And that's why I can be hard to love. But I truly believe that I deserve the type of love I have described, so it's one thing I refuse to compromise or settle on. What I really need to work on is believing that I am worthy of love.

So there you go, my thoughts on love. It's been quite the week for me so far as philosophical matters go. And that's enough for one post.

Love!

~g

December

This is a super long post

December was a very busy month full of a lot of firsts for me. At the beginning of December I had never:

1. Stayed in a hotel by myself
2. Made a trip by plane that required making a connecting flight
3. Held a full-time job
4. Had benefits that were not compliments of my parents
5. Traveled on Christmas day
6. Spent Christmas with anyone other than blood family
7. Played Santa and placed gifts under the tree while trying to be as quiet as possibly so as to not wake a sleeping child

I will probably address these out of order, but that's because they will make more sense that way. Stay with me...

1. The weekend of December 11/12 I made a trip by car to Chicago to see some friends. I left Thursday straight from work and planned to come back Sunday afternoon. I got out of work later than I hoped I would on Thursday and by the time I reached the Iowa border it was going on 10 p.m. and I was getting quite sleepy. I made the decision to stop for the night. I called Mom to have her look up some information and together we decided on the Super 8 on the Iowa side of the Mississippi. Stopping ended up being the right choice as I would have arrived in Chicago near midnight in the middle of a snow storm. Instead, I got a good night of sleep and finished the trip the next morning. That night in the hotel was the first time I had ever stayed in a hotel by myself.

I did return from Chicago on Sunday like I planned, but once again traveled in a bad snow storm. It took me a little over 6 hours to get from Chicago to the border (it should really only take about 2.5 hours). The majority of those six hours I was driving in zero visibility, white-out conditions. At one point I narrowly avoided being part of a huge pile-up. The strain of the drive really wore on me; I was thoroughly exhausted by the time I reached the border and it was getting dark. Once again I decided to stop and ended up in the exact same hotel as where I had stayed on my way to Chicago. So marked my second night alone on a hotel room.

For Christmas I made plans to travel to see a friend. I had to work Christmas Eve so getting a flight out on the 24th was not possible. Instead, I booked a 6:30 a.m. flight on Christmas morning out of Des Moines. Rather than getting up at 2 a.m. and driving to Des Moines on Christmas, I drove down after closing the store on Christmas Eve and stayed in a hotel near the airport. There you have it - from never having stayed in a hotel alone to doing it three times in the same month.

3. After 14 months with Christopher & Banks as a part-time Assistant Manager I have been promoted to full-time Assistant Manager. The hours will be roughly the same since I was already working full-time hours, and the pay won't increase right away since I'm up for a merit increase in about a month, but....

4. I now have benefits that are not due to my parents' jobs. Ok, technically I don't have the benefits yet since there is a waiting period of 30 days after the promotion takes affect (which happened on December 26) but I will soon have benefits of my very own. Holy cow! I'm grown up!

2, 5, 6, & 7 - a.k.a. My Christmas Adventure

Back in September when I traveled to Colorado for the job interview I had a seat partner on the train. I mentioned him in the post I wrote after Colorado:

"I was the only person to board the train in Ottumwa. The attendant assigned me my seat, putting me next to a firefighter from Fort Wayne, Indiana. Bryan was a good seat partner. We chatted a bit, watched a movie on my laptop, and when it came time to sleep he didn't mind that one of the more comfortable positions for me was laying my head on his shoulder. Yayy for nice people!"

Bryan and I exchanged numbers and stayed in touch in the months since and have become good friends. (Momentary tangent - you really never know how the next person you meet will affect your life. Just sayin...). Most of our getting know each other has been via the phone, but we did have the chance to get together again when I went to Chicago. We had just as much fun with each other in person while exploring all of the Chicago Christmas decorations as we had been having talking on the phone. We decided we'd like to see each other again if the opportunity came up.

At this point I should mention Bryan has sole custody of his 4-year-old son and somehow manages to work 3 jobs (fire fighter, paramedic, and medic for sporting events) while being a good dad. He's a good guy trying to do right by his family and friends and he doesn't get too many breaks, literally or figuratively.

Ok, back to the Christmas Adventure. Once I got back to work after my trip to Chicago I got my schedule for the days before and after Christmas. While I had to work the days leading up to Christmas, I had the 25-27th off. In talking with Bryan he told me he had to work all of Christmas and was trying to figure out where to leave his son for the day. It bothered both Bryan and me that his son would be with a babysitter on Christmas. Since I had no plans for the holiday I offered to travel to Indiana for Christmas and spend the day at the fire station with Bryan and his son. I figured if a call came in I could stay with the boy while Bryan and his crew responded. Bryan loved the idea so we figured out the travel logistics and made our plans. Since I couldn't get there until 11:00ish on Christmas morning it meant Bryan's son still had to spend Christmas Eve and morning with a sitter, but not the whole holiday.

I flew out of Des Moines at 6:30 on Christmas morning, made a connection in Chicago (first time I've ever done that! My connecting gate was literally 2 gates down from the gate I arrived at) and got to Fort Wayne a little after 11 a.m. Bryan was able to find someone to cover his shift for an hour so he could come get me at the airport himself. Our timing ended up being perfect. He waited outside the airport for only about a minute before I walked out. We had a little bit of time so Bryan gave me a little tour of the Fort Wayne area as we headed returned to the station. We stopped once to get some milk for the mashed potatoes then it was back to Engine Co. 6.

Bryan's son had not been dropped off yet by his babysitter so Bryan had to time to introduce me to the rest of the Christmas day crew and show me around the station. Once his son was dropped off Bryan and I spent the rest of the afternoon playing with the boy, talking, making food, and in general just hanging out. Christmas dinner was turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, salad, rolls, fruit, and a baked corn dish I meant to try but never got around to. In other words, Christmas dinner was yummy.

Bryan had to work through the night on the 25th and obviously his son and I could not stay overnight at the station, so around 8 Bryan gave me the keys to his truck and instructions to his house. I took his son home, got him into bed, and then went about being Santa and making Christmas come again. Since Bryan had missed Christmas morning with his son we just pushed back Santa's deliveries by a day. I made three trips to Santa's sleigh, got everything set up under the tree, than crashed for the night.

The morning of the 26th we had Christmas. Bryan's son totally made out in the gift department; he's got plenty of new Matchbox cars and books and movies to keep him entertained for awhile. Post Christmas and breakfast we loaded up in the car to head to Bryan's friend's house and then on to tobogganing. The tobaggan fun was had on a quarter-mile iced track. I'm not sure how quickly we were going on our first run, but I know the second run we clocked 32 MPH, and that was when we had started to slow down. So much fun!

The night of the 26th and morning of the 27th were pretty low key. We were all tired from all of the work and travel and fun so we laid low. Bryan made a good supper on the 26th (chicken piccata... yummy!), we watched some movies, then it was time for sleep.

My flight on the 27th left around 1:30 in the afternoon. I got a tour of downtown Fort Wayne that morning and then it was back to security lines and layovers, this time in Detroit, then back to Iowa and home and work.

There you have it. My Christmas Adventure, 2010 Edition. And an explanation for why I had so many new experiences in December.

Lastly, pictures!!! Sorry for the long post... I guess I had more to say and tell than I thought I did.

Love!

~g

Developments

Guess what?!

• My boss quit, effective immediately, two days ago.
• I've started attending church again.
• I'm planning a trip to Chicago in mid-December.
• I successfully fought off the stomach flu last week.
• My top and bottom sizes have dropped by a whole size each.
• I've got a crazy week of work and travel planned.

Ok, how about we take those one-by-one?

My boss quit, effective immediately, two days ago

We have had complication after issue after frustration with our manager for months (when I say we I mean the entire store staff and company in general). This past week our manager decided her time with the company was over and, after sitting down with our district manager, made the choice to vacate her position with our store and with the company. While we ultimately hope these actions will be beneficial to both our manager and the store in the long run, in the short-term things are going to be a bit chaotic. The week before Thanksgiving is not the time any retailer wants to lose staff, particularly management staff. Both the other assistant and I will be picking up a lot of extra hours and we are getting some aid from nearby stores. The "Now Hiring" sign is up but it will probably be a few weeks, if not a month or more, before we are back to a full management staff. December is going to be a real blast, let me tell you.

I've started attending church again

Around the beginning of October the nudge I have been feeling for quite some time regarding returning to church became more of a figurative and literal shove and so I once again find myself sitting, standing, singing, speaking, and listening (I couldn't think of a way to say that with an s-word) with a congregation. I have approached the pastor of the church I have been attending, resulting in he and I exchanging multiple emails and engaging in one-on-one appointments. He hooked me up with another person at the church, a woman who works primarily with young women, and she and I have also been in contact in several different ways. I was going to get involved in an all-women study group as well, but now that I no longer have specific set days off from work it is a bit hard to commit to the group.

I have been pretty quiet about this particular development as I do not want nor feel I should have to face multiple questions or even some ridicule from family and friends. Encouragement is always appreciated and accepted. So is constructive input.

The thing I am struggling with the most at this point is a desire to truly believe in God and Jesus and eternal salvation but not being able to see the Bible as anything but nice stories. It's all fiction to me, instead of truth. I can be too analytical for my own good on occasion.

I'm planning a trip to Chicago in mid-December

A long time ago (a.k.a. last week) when there was a full management staff at work I was told which weekend in December I was going to have off and I planned a trip to Chicago to see friends and have a little break. The other assistant, upon being told which weekend she would have off in December, went crazy and made travel plans as well. Despite being short-staffed we are making sure each of us gets to follow through on our plans. It will mean very long days for the person left in the store on each particular weekend, but that is alright with us. For way too long our days off from work have actually been our days on call. Life for both of us has come to center on our jobs, which is plain crazy and very not right. Neither the other assistant nor I are willing to continue in such a way. So my plans stand mostly unchanged and I will be heading to Chicago in mid-December to partake in the movie-set-esqueness that is a Chicago Christmas and to spend time with good friends I do not get to see often enough.

I successfully fought off the stomach flu last week

This one is pretty self-explanatory. I started to get sick. It was unpleasant. I said, "Oh, heck no!" (ok, maybe I wasn't that polite). I got better.

My top and bottom sizes have dropped by a whole size each

Also pretty self-explanatory. Eating healthier, walking more, and being pop/soda/cola/fizzy-drink-free for over 9 months is starting to pay off. It's slow but it's steady. I judge my success by how I look and feel in my clothing, not by how much I weigh. I would have to think long and hard to come up with the last time I was on a scale. Maybe back in February when I got sick and had to go to Urgent Care to get some antibiotics.

I've got a crazy week of work and travel planned

Off/Close/Open then drive to Minnesota/Eat food with family then drive to Iowa/Close/Open/Drive to Knoxville. That's my schedule for the next 7 days. Ridunkulous!

Love!

~g

Grace's Rules For Christmas

1. The Christmas season extends from November 1 through January 6

2. All winter-themed clothing and accessories can be worn November through February without ridicule (ok, so this less Christmas and more winter....)

3. Christmas music is acceptable year-round, with caveats:

• Christmas music can be played non-stop from the day after Thanksgiving through December 25
• Christmas music before Thanksgiving is acceptable so long as is proportioned with non-Christmas music
• Acoustic and non-lyrical Christmas music can be played any time throughout the year
• "Oh Holy Night", "O Come, O Come, Emmanuel", "Silver Bells', "Baby, It's Cold Outside", "Where Are You Christmas?", "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen", "Christmas Day", "Oh Come All Ye Faithful", "Carol of the Bells", and any song from "The Messiah" can and should be played year-round
• "Frosty The Snowman", "O Christmas Tree", "Santa Baby", "Santa Clause is Coming to Town", "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Clause", "Purple Snowflakes", and "Little Saint Nick" should be banned from the airwaves, or, you know, Earth in general

4. White Christmas lights are for inside

5. Color Christmas lights are for outside

6. One computer in the house is devoted to NORAD Tracks Santa the entire 24-hours that make up December 24

7. Christmas Eve consists of chili, driving around to look at Christmas lights, and attending midnight service

8. Presents are to be opened on Christmas Day after all showers have been taken and the Christmas story has been read from the Bible

9. Stockings are to be opened the minute you get out of bed

10. You must donate to the Salvation Army kettle whenever you pass it

11. Christmas Cookies are to be eaten in copious amounts during the months of November and December

12. The annual Christmas puzzle is dumped from its box on Thanksgiving evening and must be completed before presents can be opened on Christmas day

What are your rules for Christmas?

~g